Scared to open up and get hurt. Scared because I have no clear path of where to go next. Scared of loosing control over my body.

My reasoning keeps on talking into myself, why all of those are irrational. And my tired self just wants all of them to disappear.

Yet is that really what feeling fear is about? Trying to get rid of it?

Of course I have many reasons why I am not supposed to be scared. Of course I am tired of feeling those fears.

And at the same time, it is maybe just okay to keep on being scared. Maybe those fears are never meant to leave me. But to stay. Be the anchor, showing me how much I am still following the right direction.

A reminder, that this will always be a path. There is no such thing as getting it and applying it all right the first time.

Maybe my fears aren’t just the big boulder I have to climb over to reach freedom. Maybe they are the stones along the path, making sure I don’t lose my direction in the dark.

Maybe my fear of opening up and get hurt isn’t there to keep me from forming connections. But instead makes sure I’ll find meaning and growth in them.

Maybe my fear to lose control over my body isn’t there to shame me. But so I remember to be grateful and caring of this beautiful creature I got assigned for this lifetime.

Maybe my fear of what’s next isn’t there to intimidate me. But to assure me I am staying on the edge, that I keep on choosing the path that is only mine and no one else’s.

Maybe fear is the little kid running up to me wanting to show me something very important. Something the kid senses, closer to intuition. Something I was about to forget in the rational reasoning of adulthood.

The stones along the path.

The voice of intuition calling.

The underlying anchor keeping me grounded.

Maybe that’s what fear is.

Maybe it is not just okay to be scared. But necessary.